Vernon – SE London Fest / The Bridge House Theatre, London

Vernon, written and performed by Gary Bates, is a heartfelt monologue about a funeral director whose work forces him to face his own grief. Blending dry humour with an emotional core, it’s a simple but powerful piece of new writing at SE Fest.

Image credit: Gary Bates.

Vernon

Vernon is a one-man play about a funeral director, written and performed by Gary Bates. We meet the titular character outside a pub where a funeral is taking place, and he talks directly to us. It’s as if you’ve stepped out for some air and found yourself in conversation with a stranger who has a story to tell. He takes us back through his younger days, meeting his wife, the ups and downs of marriage, and the challenges of parenting in the modern age. Alongside this, we learn how he fell into working in a funeral home, and how it became a surprisingly rewarding career.

There’s humour from the outset, mostly dry and a bit dark, but very human. As Vernon goes on, the story shifts towards heavier territory, and we start to see the cracks in his armour. It’s well suited to SE Fest’s focus on new writing: minimal set, a strong idea, and engaging delivery that can hold an audience for an hour. The only bit that felt less successful for me was when Bates switched into playing other characters, like himself and his wife in their first encounters. It took me out of the “chat outside the pub” feeling, when the piece was at its best in that confessional mode.

A Small Play That Speaks to Something Big

Where Vernon really lands is in its emotional weight. Rather than being just another of the daily and weekly services he attends as a Funeral Director, it’s the one that forces him to confront his own grief. Bates slowly lets us see the heart of the story, and when that arrives it carries real force. What begins as anecdotes and asides builds into something much more personal, about love and loss, and the pressures that ripple through families.

The performance is simple but effective. Bates keeps us engaged with changes of pace and tone, and even when he stretches to show other voices, the through-line stays clear. There’s no heavy staging or tricks to lean on. It’s just a man telling his story, with humour when he can, and honesty when he can’t avoid it. By the end, the room is left with that rare thing: a small play that speaks to something big, and does it without fuss.

Salterton Arts Review’s rating: 3/5

Vernon was on at the Jack Studio Theatre and Bridge House Theatre (where I saw it) on 5-6 September 2025 as part of SE Fest.